Tag Archives: Article by Yu/stan/kema.

The Gift Of Memory At Christmas And The New Year.

26 Saturday Dec 2020

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Found on Pinterest on December 10, 2015. Dave Bowman.

At times, like these, when we are going through so many difficult challenges, it can seem like the world is a lonely place when you are isolated from the people and the things that have always been so much of a part of the holidays. Many of us were unable to fly and see important people, those family members and friends who are so dear to our hearts. Some of us, because of health problems, were unable to make it to our places of worship.

Even though modern technology has made it possible to attend church on the internet, or our tv’s, not all of us do so. We each have choices we can make regarding how we get through this Christmas season.

Pinterest on the internet has wonderful pictures of Jesus and His birth. Most of us have holiday DVD’s we can play, Christmas carols we can listen to, Christmas books we can read. But most of us also have a gift we can tap into that can make our lives more enjoyable, and that can leave a warm fire burning in our hearts. We have the gift of being able to remember past Christmases. We have been given the ability to store experiences in our brains. The older you become, the memories become more vivid and real.

I can remember, as if it were yesterday, going to candlelight services on Christmas Eve with my husband and son. We stood in a room full of soft light from the candles, lighting up the faces of people around us, and celebrated the birth of Jesus while singing songs that drew us together as one. 

The next day, I heard my young son get up, and I laughed as I heard the pitter-patter of little feet running to the living room. The excitement in his voice was infectious as he called for us to join him. The manger was lit up that he and I had put together. He ran and got a gift and brought it to me to open, and together we placed a new piece of the manger scene where Christ slept. I can still hear his chatter as he opened his gifts in front of the Christmas tree we had all decorated. Later, he stood on a little stool as he helped me make Christmas dinner. That evening, we baked cookies and smacked our lips as we ate them. I remember so many wonderful memories.

This Christmas, we could not see each other, but we both cooked Christmas dinners. We shared over the phone what we had made. He baked for the holidays, and I am about to bake toll house cookies today like I did years ago. We  connected the past and the present and found some Christmas joy. I am grateful to God that I have the gift of memory.                                                                                                       

Found on Pinterest on 12-6-15. Capturing Joy by Kristen Duke Photography.

Yu/stan/kema.

” What Matters To The Old.”

31 Saturday Aug 2019

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In my previous post, I shared with my readers the poem: “Growing Old,” written by Ella Wheeler Wilcox. As I read it, I was reminded that we move through different developmental stages while walking down the road of life. Our goals and what we choose to focus our energies upon change from one developmental stage to another if we are growing as mature human beings. Our thoughts, feelings, and fears change as well.

As I grew older, I became aware that friendships and good relationships with others increased in importance, and a sense of family and belonging was necessary for survival. It mattered more, in the long run, than being rich, having adventures, being successful in what I attempted, or having a lot of status. These things are often lost along the way. As we age, loving, being loved, and being protected matter. We cherish the memories we form from such experiences, the human touch from those that care for us, and the resources, information, and feelings of belonging we get from being connected with others.

I am in my seventies and have encountered many losses along the way. My income has decreased, my status in society has dropped, my health has deteriorated, and I can no longer do the job I loved because of health problems. I have struggled to make sense of a Country I love becoming a place I no longer recognize or respect. I have lost faith and trust in Her. My former ideals have taken a beating. Yet, I still fight for what She once stood for.

Even though life has brought losses, it also has brought blessings and wonderful connections. I have friends, contacts with family, and supportive people in my life. I have shelter, water, and food to eat. My mind still works, and I have people who encourage me to grow emotionally and spiritually. They have taught me valuable skills, and I am in the process of changing.

Growing older, I am less preoccupied with dying and more focused on living in the here and now. I appreciate others more and say “I love you” to those who matter, because I may not get another chance later. I am more attuned to what is just, what is true, and what is morally good in life rather than following the crowd. My need for silence and solitude grows with every year that passes, and i have less desire to interact with technology and the media which is time consuming. Being comfortable is more important than being stylish. Talking about things of value is desired rather than superficial conversations. I think more about God and spirituality than clothes and the shoes I should wear.

My environment and the beauty of nature is essential for my survival. I will fight to protect them. All human beings are necessary for survival. We are connected to one another as human beings and spiritual entities. We all suffer losses, feel joy, share sadness, dream dreams, and have the need to be accepted by others, to feel we belong. We share the earth and resources so we can survive. Being compassionate towards other human beings does matter.

Yu/stan/kema

 

How Will History Remember Us?

24 Wednesday Apr 2019

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The sun is setting on our democracy, and we are at a crossroads. We must choose what we want our Nation to represent and how we want our children to live. Will we choose: Freedom or tyranny; Honesty or deception; Love or hate; Generosity or greed; Acceptance or discrimination; Rule of law or chaos; Kindness or cruelty; Goodness or evil; or Creation instead of destruction?

We all play a role in making our Nation a better place to live. We can choose to live in a world full of violence, dirty drinking water, polluted air, recalled food, nuclear war, lack of civility, and selfishness. We can also choose to live in a clean environment, to protect beauty and all living things, to respect and help other people, to choose peace instead of war, to learn to compromise, and to promote kindness and what is good. There cannot be passiveness. All of us will decide how history will remember us and our Nation. We need to choose wisely.

Yu/stan/kema

 

Poems That Often Reflect One’s Life.#2: “You Never Can Tell,” by Ella Wheeler Wilcox.

23 Wednesday Jan 2019

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What Kind Of Country Do I Want To Build?

Most of the time, I think in terms of where I want to live. In the last two years, I  became aware that I was focusing on the wrong thing. I should have asked instead, “What kind of Country do I want to build?” No matter where I go or live, I can choose to help create what kind of Country I want. A Country is made up of people, values, a way of life, and an image of what it stands for. A Country also has resources and it makes decisions on how it divides the resources among its population. It determines what should be done when strangers approach.

In the past, people became involved in what was being built. Each person was encouraged to participate in the process whether it was a barn raising, forming a Church, starting a school, or collectively meeting together to decide on values to uphold and rules all should abide by. The schools, churches, and homes were aware they needed to be instruments in informing others what the boundaries would be, the rules to be obeyed, the values upheld, and how other people would be treated.

Somewhere along the way, we became distracted by the internet, the cell phones, and allowing the media to reflect back to us its views of what was acceptable behavior, what words to use, and how to treat other people. We became slaves of time. We stopped building and was content to let others take the responsibility of deciding for us what kind of Country we would live in. As a result, we ended up living in a place where chaos was normal and peace was hard to find. Owning up to your own mistakes became a rarity. Blaming others for everything, and treating minorities with no respect became the new normal. Hatred and dividing others became goals. Parents gave up or were too tired to teach children how to behave,what to expect, and what values to claim and live by. We stopped building our Country and became passive.

To build again will take everyone deciding and changing his words, his actions, and his thoughts. Each person needs to see how he influences and impacts others. Ella Wheeler Wilcox wrote about this in a poem: “You Never Can Tell.” Here are a few last stanzas of the poem:

“You never can tell when you do an act

Just what the result will be,

But with every deed you are sowing a seed,

Though the harvest you may not see.

Each kindly act is an acorn dropped

In God’s productive soil;

You may not know, but the tree shall grow

With shelter for those who toil.

 

You never can tell what your thoughts will do

In bringing you hate or love,

For thoughts are things, and their airy wings

Are swifter than carrier doves.

They follow the law of the universe,

Each thing must create its kind,

And they speed o’er the track to bring you back

Whatever went out from your mind.”

ELLA WHEELER WILCOX

 

Yu/stan/kema

Being Strong Has It’s Ups and Downs.

12 Saturday Jan 2019

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We love people who are strong and positive; those who can cope effectively with difficult circumstances; and we often admire those who don’t cry. We need to have people we can lean on when the world falls apart. We respect people who are fighters and who refuse to quit. We need our heroes and people who inspire us to be the best we can be. The truly strong can accept responsibility when things go wrong. They don’t complain and actively try to solve problems.

In return, the strong feel confident they can survive because of the pain they have endured. They feel others look up to them, need them, and want them to take control. The strong know their role is not to be a burden, but a blessing to society. They know they can rely on themselves when things get dicey. They have learned how to confront their fears and regulate their emotions.

There are downsides to being strong. People tend to rely on the strong to always be there, and to step in when there is a crisis.  They are often used by others and end up in one-sided relationships. They are expected to play a certain role and  when they fail to play the role, they may lose relationships or be shamed until they return to their expected role.   

Because they are human, the face of strength cracks. The strong feel they can’t be their real selves or share sincere emotions. If they cry or reach out for help, they fear other people will stop needing them or wanting them. Often, the strong suffer in silence.

It is up to each one of us to make the effort to give back to those who give so much to us, to offer help when we see they are struggling, to show appreciation after they help us, to let them know that it is OK to reach out for help, and to communicate with us when they feel isolated and alone.

We all need people who are strong, but they also need our acceptance when they need help. The strong give so much to the world. They deserve better from us.

Yu/stan/kema.

The Changing Face Of Perception.

06 Tuesday Feb 2018

Posted by in Article., Psychology, spirituality

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It always amazes me how in times of adversity, our lives seem to take on a covering of darkness. We are quick to call it fate, being unlucky in life, or we are being punished by some outside force for not doing what we are told to do. We develop tunnel vision and list all the negative events in our lives to prove to ourselves that we are correct in our assumptions why a particular event occurs.

We rail against God, fate, or the unreasonable expectations of others. We criticize ourselves for the mistakes we make like trusting other people too much or relying on others instead of doing it ourselves. We tell ourselves we should be smarter, stronger, wiser, better equipped, and more self-reliant.

But the truth about adversity or negative events occurring may be as simple as reminding ourselves that life has always been full of positive and negative events. The sun rises and the sun sets, seasons come and go, and things live and things die. Good and evil exist in our world. We are given things and sometimes they are taken away whether we like it or not. Life happens and our sense of being in control fluctuates throughout our life span.

We can make our lives easier if we just accept that change is a part of living, and that evil exists but we can choose to be a force for good in our own lives, and the lives of those we come in contact with. We can learn better coping skills and teach ourselves to accept those things we can not change. We can also remind ourselves of our blessings and learn to enjoy them in the moments we are experiencing them. We can take them out and look at them again in times of adversity and remind ourselves that goodness and love still exist, even in the darkness.

In order to do this, we have to make a commitment to observe our thoughts and emotions. Our thoughts come and we can feel our emotions, but we don’t have to  allow them to overwhelm us. We can choose to become active participants in our own lives, or we can choose to focus on being victims in need of safety. It will take persistence, courage, and trust in ourselves to achieve this. In the end, we can also find peace.

Yu/stan/kema

Life Is A Balancing Act.

02 Thursday Nov 2017

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     LIFE IS A BALANCING ACT.

Found on Pinterest on 4-7-17. Akhyar Maha on Five hundred,px.

From the time we are born until the time we die, we seem to juggle things in our environment in order to get our needs met or find a place of equilibrium so we can feel safe and reasonably happy.

As a baby, we learn to cry to get attention so we can signal to others that something is not as we want it to be whether it be a lack of food, water, or a clean bottom. As we grow older, we learn the cues on how to please those we rely upon for our survival. If we frown too much or scream too much, we often upset the apple cart and don’t get our needs met in the affectionate way we prefer. We may get what we want, but we may pay a price for our impatience. If we call people names or curse, we learn we may not get what we need at all. 

As we grow into adulthood, we learn how to compromise, how to give in when the cost is not too prohibitive. When love comes along, we learn to sacrifice at times so the other person gets what he or she needs or wants. We learn the art of give and take, the difference between need and want, and how to analyze the pros and cons of a situation.  And sadly, we learn with a lot of pain, what happens when we give too much when the other person gives too little. We come to understand the delicate balance of caring for our own needs as well as those of other people.

As we enter in to the sunset of our lives, we find the balance between taking risks and being safe, how much to cling to and when to let go. We learn to slow down, if we are intelligent, and we take the time to be aware of what is around us and become grateful for the little things in life.

We find that we can survive with less, and that love and family is more valuable than having lots of money to spend. We become more interested in what we leave behind and what lies before us and less interested in material things. We learn that loss happens to all of us and that we need to take the time to grieve for those things that are gone. We learn to balance our expectations when coming face to face with what is, and most of all, we come to value peace, above all things. Hopefully, we find the courage to walk the tight-rope between life and death before we finally let go for the very last time.

Yu/stan/kema 

                                            

BOOK REVIEW: ” When God Winks At You. How God Speaks Directly To You Through The Power Of Coincidence.”

19 Saturday Aug 2017

Posted by in Article., Books, Psychology, spirituality, Uncategorized

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Squire Rushnell wrote a book in 2006 about ways God communicates with us through circumstances that occur daily in our own personal lives. The title of the book shortened is: When God Winks At You… We usually think of God communicating with us through prayer or through the Bible.  What if God actually allows events to fall in to place at the same time we have a feeling of sorrow, anger, or fear, and we yearn for comfort or reassurance? What if in a moment of hopelessness or confusion when we are in need of guidance, a person, book, or sermon crosses our path to give us what we need? What if in a moment of dark despair, we hear a sermon on TV, or meet a neighbor on our street who renews our faith in God, or our hope for the future?

Could that make an impact in our lives and change us in ways that are positive and uplifting? Squire shares stories from famous people to illustrate this.

I have learned over the years that events seemed to happen at the same time in my life that became building blocks for creating, “who I am today.” At the age of ten, the courts changed where I lived. I was exposed to good food, clean sheets, a huge library of books, and a safe place to read poems and stories written by famous writers. I started writing shortly after that. I learned values from Henry Van Dyke, William Wordsworth, Emily Dickinson, Jane Austin, Ralph Waldo Emerson, and many more. I was given the opportunity to get a college education, which probably would not have happened if I had not changed residences when I was ten.

Through out my life, I loved to visit bookstores. While browsing, I have had urges to search in a certain section, or pick up a particular book, and know I would find answers to my questions within a book’s pages.  I earned a teacher’s degree and spent four years teaching children who lived across the street in the same children’s home I had lived in at the age of ten. Out of all the schools found in my home town, I was hired to teach in that school. Was it random or part of God’s plan?

Later in life, I married and had a child who would one day go to college and end up working for a company who specializes in making medications to treat a serious illness I acquired after retiring. I never knew I would get ill. He had already been working in this area, before I got ill. Was it random or God’s way of saying, “I’ve got your back?”

Time after time, things like this happen. I can feel bad, and look out and see a Cardinal fly up to my front porch and peer through my living room window at me, when I haven’t seen one for months. I can walk down the street and see a rare flower nodding to me in the wind. Is God communicating with me? I want to believe  that He is.

I just wish when I’m going through difficult times, I could remember to look for the good, the positive, the blessings I do have instead of focusing on what’s negative, or become so overwhelmed by emotions that I’m blind to everything else. I guess that has something to do with being a human being. I have the power to change that, however, if I choose to do so.  Reading this book is a step in the right direction.1

Yu/ stan/kema.

1 Rushnell, Squire.2006. When God Winks At You. How God Speaks Directly To You Through The Power Of Coincidence. Nashville, Tennessee. W. Printing, an imprint of Thomas Nelson.

Doing The Work Of Jesus.

12 Wednesday Jul 2017

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         DOING THE WORK OF JESUS.

Found on Pinterest on 7-9-17. Written by Henri Nouwen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If I had to encapsulate in a small bit of space what our life on earth is all about, the quote above from Henri Nouwen, would do it beautifully for me.

When we are young, our minds are full of things we want  to accomplish. Our energies become directed toward getting  a good job, getting the home we’ve always dreamed of owning,  and finding someone to share our life with. A lot of our precious time is spent texting, on the internet, listening to music, or doing                   what we really enjoy doing. We also spend a great deal of time parenting our children.

When we grow old, we have fewer distractions to occupy our minds.We are given the gift of time. We slow down, find time to smell flowers, watch butterflies, touch trees, and observe more intently the things in our environment. We also spend more time contemplating life, exploring our own inner world, and more time searching and talking to God, or studying religion and philosophy.

We spend time asking ourselves questions and trying to sort out for ourselves what really matters in life, what we can’t do without, and what our purpose is, and have we fulfilled what we were sent to do. We come to the realization that People matter. Reconciling relationships and finding resolution matters. Finding our way back to the God of our childhood so that we can call God Abba, matters.

Life finally lets us know that Love is our purpose on earth. We are here to work for peace, to offer forgiveness to others, as well as ourselves. We are here to care for People without discrimination or judgment. We are here to care for the hungry, the sick, the dying, the poor, the old, the disabled, and always the children. This is what God sent us to do, and we must find the strength and courage to do it, even in difficult times.

Yu/stan/kema

 

 

FINDING WHAT WE ARE BORN TO DO.

26 Monday Jun 2017

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Found on Pinterest on 6-24-17. Flower girl. Saved from touchn2btouched.tumblr. com. HD Exhibit theme by Dustin Hoffman.

FINDING WHAT WE ARE BORN TO DO.

In life, we end up trying out multiple things to see if we enjoy doing them. We also tend to do again what we are successful in accomplishing. But what is rare in life is to find something we are passionate about, something in life we are born to do.

We can feel the difference inside our bodies, our minds, and our souls. Our attention becomes focused on that which we love. We can feel a rhythm in our body and a heightened awareness inside our innermost self. It almost feels like our soul is dancing with the universe. We are driven  to be more, and we touch joy while we are doing the thing we are born to do. Our mind, body and soul unite while doing it. We become transformed and renewed by what we feel and are.

 The girl dressed as a flower in the picture is performing ballet. She is focused and feels an inner rhythm. She literally believes she is a flower for a period of time. She is dancing with the universe and she feels the magic. We feel the magic too while watching her.

There is nothing like it when we do what we are meant to do. We feel alive and happy. We also feel like we are giving to others the best of what we are. We are giving the gift of ourselves and we are creating magic from within our soul. We offer that gift to the world.

Yu/stan/kema