Sorrow entwined with anger
To create a type of rage.
Despite what I’ve learned,
I cannot turn the page,
Or put it in its cage.
Perhaps because I know,
Its turned into a flame
That engulfs past shame.
I know ” to rely,”
Is critical to growth,
Yet when I really try,
And open up my soul,
I’m told I want too much.
They can’t meet this need,
That I’m an open wound,
Part of my mother’s seed.
I’m told I want a crutch,
That my effort to rely,
Is just a form of greed.
Impatiently, they sigh.
My self curls up,
And I begin to cry
From trying hard to give,
From learning how to trust.
I feel my self die
In many different ways.
I know that I live
With only half a heart.
Having a balance
Is a learned art.
Allowing time’s a must.
When I’m told, ” I fail,”
It’s not done with malice,
“It’s for my own good.”
It comes across as callous.
It’s a ” this and ” situation
That tears me apart.
I’m filled with frustration.
I’m doomed at the start.
It’s an awful sensation.
Yu/stan/kema.