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REFLECTIONS OF A MINDFUL HEART AND SOUL

~ Articles, Quotations, Poetry, Humor, and Resources to Feed the Hungry Soul..

REFLECTIONS OF A MINDFUL HEART  AND SOUL

Monthly Archives: January 2015

SOMEBODY IS THINKING OF YOU.

31 Saturday Jan 2015

Posted by Yu/stan/kema in photo, Poetry, Psychology, quote

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Tags

Alone, George Mathias, hope, life, lost, sadness

sad-love-poem on Google+ on 1-7-15. Kopiera.  George Mathias. Love quotes.

sad-love-poem on Google+ on 1-7-15. Kopiera. George Mathias. Love quotes.

Don’t give up on life,

You’ve got to hang tough.

Somebody loves you

 More than enough.

 

Though life has taken

All that you had. 

There is always tomorrow, 

And No, you’re not bad.

 

I’ve been where you’re at,

So I know you feel lost.

You’ve got to hang on 

Whatever the cost.

 

Somebody is waiting

For someone like you.

So don’t give up hope

Whatever you do.

 

Around the next corner, 

Life’s got a surprise 

To warm up your heart

And put love in your eyes.

   –Yu/stan/kema–

HEAVEN IS FOUND IN RELATIONSHIPS.

31 Saturday Jan 2015

Posted by Yu/stan/kema in photo, Poetry, quote, spirituality, Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

heaven, life, love, Pinterest quote., sharing

Found on Pinterest on 1-07-15.

Found on Pinterest on 1-07-15.

Life is heaven

When somebody shares

His sorrows and secrets, 

His ambitions and cares.

 

Just two arms to hold us

And a smile to cheer;

Two lips to kiss us

Every night of the year.

 

Two hands to touch us

And two eyes to smile,

A voice that gets husky

And life is worth while.

 

One laugh to thrill us 

And a heart to endure

 The pain of heart-break

And be as mature

 

As one mind can be

Toward all that we meet,

To tell us to grow up

And still be as sweet

 

As when we are doing

All that we can

To honor all people

And take a firm stand.

 

One hand to lift us

And help us be great,

To search through our soul

And correct a mistake.

 

Two minds to think with,

And share every thought

And all the deep sorrows

That living has brought.

 

One soul to grow with

And worship our God,

To study His word

Without seeming odd.

 

Just one voice to answer

All the questions that come

And hear our solutions

And not think us dumb.

 

Just one soul to honor 

And some one who shares.

Life is heaven

When somebody cares.

Yu/stan/kema (age 33)

 

 

THE HEART OF GIVING.

31 Saturday Jan 2015

Posted by Yu/stan/kema in Psychology, quote, spirituality, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

factors that influence giving, giving, reasons for giving

This is a topic that has occupied my mind for the last few days. I had a colleague ask me about motivations for giving.  It seems clear that people are different in the degree that they give, who they give to, and the things they give. The reasons they give are different for every one.

The dictionary defines giving as: to present voluntarily and without expectation, or compensation in return; to hand to someone or to place in someone’s care; and to present or deliver voluntarily to the permanent possession of another or others. Oscar Wilde once wrote: ” To give and not expect return is what lies at the heart of love.” Another way to phrase it would be: Pure love is a willingness to give without a thought of receiving any thing in return. Some people believe you cannot love someone without giving. I will try and use myself as an example in this discussion.

I have American Indian ancestors. They were a giving people and it is a part of my heritage. Who ever is in need is to be given to. I grew up in a family where there was neglect and abuse, I saw very little giving in my developmental years. It was not modeled for me to be caring nor giving. Strangely enough, because of my close ties to nature and God. I was a very sensitive and empathic child. How that happened, is a miracle in itself. All through my life, I have given a lot. Never because I had to. I gave because I knew what it was like to have little food, money, and to never get positive time from others. I think that fed into me being empathic, but my siblings are not that way. I give because I genuinely care about people and their welfare. I never want others to know hunger, have no access to resources, and live their lives without any one caring. I have never done so because I felt I had to. I wanted to give. I did not give so that others would give to me. I didn’t expect gifts. If I received something, I was always grateful and humbled by it.

I have given of my resources when I had it to give. I  have helped a family member out a lot, not out of obligation, or because I have to, but because I care for someone else’s welfare. Over the years, I have given to strangers, to my enemies, those in need, and my community and society . I validate and compliment others a lot. I share information for any one who wants it. It is in me to care. It is in me to give unconditionally. I feel more whole when I do, more a part of God, the universe, and a part of humanity. When I love, I give, but I also give to my enemies. I feel gratitude when I give and overwhelming joy. I get pleasure in giving, and I feel it is a vital part of who I am. I’ve never given to get someone to like me, or to manipulate any one, or to control people. I give because I want to.

What about you? When do you give, to whom do you give, what kinds of things do you give, and why do you do it? It can really  give you a lot of insight into your own self to answer these questions

Things That Help You Survive: The Attribute of Giving.

30 Friday Jan 2015

Posted by Yu/stan/kema in Article., photo, Psychology, quote, spirituality

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Christianity, giving, needs of the group, Pinterest quote., survival skills

The attribute of giving is important for society and for our own emotional and spiritual development. In the days of our ancestors, ethnic groups or clans of people roamed the earth to search for food and shelter. Each member of the group contributed in some way so that the group would be able to survive. Those who had resources gave some to those who did not. Each member of the tribe was seen as a necessary part of the group. They instinctively knew this was important if every member was to stay alive. They knew the more members they had, the safer they would be and the more food they could gather. It also made a contented group less likely to rob or steal from one another. They often praised each other in circles for the skills they brought to the group. They gave what they could. No member felt inferior to another and those that needed more were not shamed because of their need. They took care of the elderly, the children, and the disabled. There was respect for human life and caring for their members. They didn’t see it as something they had to do. They saw this was a need and they did it for the good of the group.

In present day society, it seems  we  are being told often by others that self-interest ought to be our way of operating. The state wants to be free of the burden of the children, the elderly, the disabled. At the Federal level in the United States, we only have to look at Congress and their squabbles to see how they feel about taking care of others. In our homes, we have slacked off on children doing their share of contributing in doing chores or helping care for others in the family. ” I’m watching T.V., tell someone else to help,” is often heard. I hear people telling others they should be ashamed for needing things.

Found on Pinterest on 1-25-15.

Found on Pinterest on 1-25-15. ( I read somewhere else that the major civilizations that have fallen had one characteristic in common: They stopped taking care of the children, the elderly, and the disabled. That gives us something to think about. Yu/stan/kema.)

Almost every major religion teaches us we should take care of the poor, those who are old or disabled. They also include the children. In the Bible, we are told more than once to do this. The whole New Testament is filled with examples of giving. References to love and to give to others is found throughout and our spiritual welfare depends on doing it. We are told to love and to give even to our enemies. When we do give, it brings us closer to God and to our fellow human beings. Giving safeguards our survival in society and in the Church.

Things That Help You Survive: A Sense Of Purpose In Life.

29 Thursday Jan 2015

Posted by Yu/stan/kema in Article., Psychology, quote, spirituality, Uncategorized

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Tags

contribution to society, mission, Pinterest quote., sense of purpose, survival, vision

Found on Pinterest on 12-28-14.

Found on Pinterest on 12-28-14.

A sense of purpose in life is one of the most important needs humanity has. It is what gets us up in the morning and what makes us keep going in life when every thing else goes wrong. It focuses our attention on what is important to us, what matters in the grand scheme of things. It helps us set priorities in our lives. It allocates where our energy, time, and money is spent. Each man’s purpose is usually different from the people around him.

When our value system or religion becomes attached to our purpose in life, it can become our mission in life, that which we feel deeply about. When it is a vision, it becomes a conceptualization of what we want it to look like over a span of time. It is important for us to have a sense of purpose because it lets us know how we fit in at work, home, church, or society. Each of us has a need to contribute something of value to the world or leave something behind to define us and our lives. We want to matter in the universe and make a difference by having lived. It gives our life routine and structure. It allows us to become creative and often it defines who we are as a person. When we know our purpose, we set goals for ourselves to help us decide whether we are accomplishing what we want to create with our lives. A sense of purpose brings joy to those who have it.

When we have no purpose in our lives, we are like a boat without a rudder. We lose our way and we don’t know what direction to turn. We make every thing a priority and do little. We have nothing to shoot for. We have nothing to set goals for. We are apt to feel unimportant, that we don’t matter to any one. When we lose our place in society, we lose our connection and place in the community. We begin to question our worth as people. This brings with it depression, anxiety, and sadness. A sense of purpose is vital for our survival and our happiness in life.

Yu/stan/kema

Things That Help You Survive: Developing Positive Thinking.

29 Thursday Jan 2015

Posted by Yu/stan/kema in Article., Psychology, quote, spirituality

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

anxiety, brain chemicals, depression, Developing positive thinking, God, life events, parental messages, parents

Developing Positive Thinking is easier to do when life is going smoothly.  You can see all around you evidence of God’s blessings. It’s a snap of the fingers to say, “My job is going well. I have a happy marriage and family. My kids are great, and my health is good. I feel good about me, others, and the world. God is great and He is good.”

Good parents educate and teach their children to see the world in a positive way even if things go bad. They help children to store positive messages in their heads to use when times are tough. They do this by repetition and by sharing messages they were given. Examples are: “Don’t let any one tell you you’re no good. You are a Smith and the Smiths are outstanding people.” Or in bad times, the message is given: “Tomorrow is another day. You are resourceful. You can make it happen. I believe in you.”

It becomes more difficult to practice positive thinking when you suffer from depression or anxiety. If there is a chemical imbalance, you have to fight that as well. Serotonin helps the brain feel good. If you are low in that chemical, it can alter how you see the world and feel about it.

If you come from an abusive family or a neglectful one, you were probably never given positive messages to store inside your brain. Chances are the messages you received from your parents were: “You’re no good. You can’t do any thing right. You will always be a failure.” These are internalized in childhood and are pulled out later in life to explain their world and how they see others relating to them. As adults, they have to learn new messages and get affirming feedback from others about themselves. This presents an extra hurdle in developing positive thinking.

God tells us we are to develop positive thinking by focusing on the positive things in our lives instead of the negative. Even when times get hard, He teaches us to focus on having faith in Him, relying on Him to help us, and to train our minds to think differently about life and other people. He  often tells us that tomorrow is another day filled with many possibilities. He makes it clear that we have a choice, and that we have to work on having a better attitude, a better perspective on Life. He didn’t tell us it would be easy. He tells us,  it will be hard.

Found on Pinterest on 1-29-15. Philippians 4:8 in the Bible.

Found on Pinterest on 1-29-15.         Philippians 4:8 in the Bible.

Yu/stan/kema

What Really Matters To Children.

28 Wednesday Jan 2015

Posted by Yu/stan/kema in photo, Poetry

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Tags

caring, child, faith in God, Google+ photo., pain

What Matters

Today you learned

that when a child

Is filled with pain,

She needs to know

She’s not alone,

Found on Google+ on 12-28-14.

Found on Google+ on 12-28-14.

That you’ll remain

Close by to help her

Find trust again.

 

You talked with a

 Gentle voice and

Told her she was safe.

You let her know

You cared for her.

She needs a little faith

That God is always 

On her side and

He loves her so.

Yu/stan/kema

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

.

 

Things That Help You Survive: Enjoying The Little Things In Life.

26 Monday Jan 2015

Posted by Yu/stan/kema in Article., photo, Psychology, spirituality, Uncategorized

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birds, clouds, enjoy life, God, little things in life, sun, survival skills, trees, wind

Red Cardinal- Marilou Aballe. Google+.1-25-15

Red cardinal. Marilou Aballe. Google+.1-25-15

To survive in difficult times, I search for things in my environment to focus on and become mindful about. I can stare at the trees in my neighborhood for a few hours. I watch the birds come and go, send out a few bird calls to the cardinals and blue jays, and observe the sparrows on the ground trying to find something to eat. I notice the rich, red coat of the cardinal and the black markings on his face. I see the blue jay  causing a ruckus with his ill temper and he tries to cause a fight with the cardinals. When things calm down, I see the wild rabbits across the street very carefully take slow hops across the grass to find something to eat. They look plump and twitch their noses at me sitting on the porch. They never seem to be frightened of me. I call out a good morning to them and I swear that I see them chuckling to themselves as they gaze at me.

I watch the clouds drift across the sky and I am lost in their soft billowy shape, texture and color. My eyes close for a time. I feel the cool wind touch my face with a finger-like touch and the rays of the sun bathe my body with warmth and light. I have an overwhelming urge to go to sleep and spend the day outdoors.

The wind becomes stronger and the bare trees begin to sway in this wonderful slow dance that causes the heartbeat to slow and the breath catch in my throat. Trees of many shapes and colors surround me in sunlight. I get up and go down the street and I am mesmerized by their movement back and forth.

I touch the bark of a sycamore tree and notice the smoothness of the skin-like bark. I stand with my hands against the tree and I feel its strength flooding my body and spirit. I talk to it gently, and let it know I am grateful for its shade in the spring and summer months. I tell the tree I like the shape of its leaves, the way the branches move in the wind. I  encourage it to survive the winter. I hug the tree and close my eyes and feel that we are one. I thank the tree for giving me strength as my ancestors did long ago. I pick up acorns underneath the oak trees reveling in their different shapes and sizes. I stick them in my pocket as I head home, feeling my fingers gently rub their smooth surfaces. I feel I am one with everything: trees, rabbits, clouds, birds, sky, sun, and wind. Every thing else seems small in comparison. I feel I am a part of the universe,and every thing I touch is a part of God.

Yu/stan/kema

Things That Help You Survive: Connections To People

25 Sunday Jan 2015

Posted by Yu/stan/kema in Article., Psychology, spirituality, Uncategorized

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Tags

and soul., caring from others, connections to people, healing body, mind, trauma

                                             Connections

When Trauma occurs, the mind becomes overwhelmed by what is happening and cannot process it and integrate it as it needs to be. Many times the consequences of trauma continues for years until it gets processed correctly. In order to handle the trauma, the victims may shut down thoughts and feelings as well as sensations in order to block it from their mind. Some are able to do this by sleeping, becoming apathetic, depressed, and using alcohol and drugs. They decide to stop experiencing life as we know it. They will isolate, cut off from others, and carry their pain inside them. They become quiet and non-interactive. They do this out of a need to protect themselves.

Some will cut off memory of the event and feelings and act as if it did not occur. They may even delegate a part of their mind to take care of the memory, sensations, and feelings. Others will try to cope with it with anger and rage, suicidal behavior, or become irritable and secretive with family members, friends. They may even act out because of inside pressure and do things they regret later like leave home to get away, get a divorce, etc. Triggers can set them off that remind them of the trauma.

These things are not done on purpose. Most of the behavior occurs when the person is triggered by something in their environment that reminds them of the trauma. They cannot deal with a flood of stimuli or multiple demands being made on them at the same time. At times, they crave silence and the quiet so they can breathe and try to find a moment of peace. They need the understanding from others, and they need to be given space when they want it. They need time to rest their weary minds, time to heal.

When they are ready to talk, they need someone to just listen. They need comfort when they cry, trust in them when they get angry. They need to know you care for them no matter what happened to them, and despite what they have done. They will push you away, try to drive you away with words in order to protect you and themselves. In trauma, the soul has been wounded. They will also need spiritual help as well as psychological help. Most of all, they need your compassion and your caring. They need to connect to people. The soul requires it in order to heal.  They will fight this, but it is the only way they can heal, but they need time to get there. Support groups can help. Writing about what is going on inside them and sharing it can be beneficial. Psychotherapy will help. Connecting with friends, family, and loved one’s will be useful. This will make healthy survival possible.

Yu/stan/kema

Things That Help You Survive: Connections To Objects, Animals, and People.

25 Sunday Jan 2015

Posted by Yu/stan/kema in Article., Psychology, Uncategorized

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

animals, connections, death, divorce, illness, losses, people., survival, things

                                               Connections

When we are in survival mode and going through difficulties, we often feel lost, confused, dazed, unsure of what we are anymore or where we belong. The very things that went into making us who we are can change. This is true whether it is a divorce, loss of a job, loss of good health, or the loss of people who for years supported us, took care of us, and who played a part in forming our identities. Our self-identity is shaken And doubts creep in about our ability to cope with the difficulties that face us.

Divorce has a way of turning our lives upside down. Structure, routine, the comfort of knowing your kids are safe and living under your roof can change with a court order. The house you spent money and labor on, the memories you made while staying there, and the neighbors who became like family, can be gone in a heartbeat.The person who was to grow old with you and care for you is gone. Your identity as a wife, as a mother, the person who keeps the family together has changed. What can help you survive, may be keeping the house, the yard, your gardens, one of the dogs, and to be able to have equal custody and access to the children when needed. Without this, you become lost and have to begin again.

Belongings help anchor us and orient us in life, especially people with past traumas. Many of the elderly fight tooth and nail to stay in their homes. They don’t want to lose access to the very things that shaped who they are as people. We need the things that are important to us and that are filled with old memories.

We need to connect to animals in order to survive. They give us something to hold on to, to touch, to take care of, and in return they care for us unconditionally. They protect us, nuzzle us, look happy when we show up, and they are there for us. They get us up in the morning, get us on track with the routine, and they get close to us when we cry. They move us out of the house and into the fresh air when we want to curl up and disappear. Animals are important when you are trying to survive. Connections with people are essential and will be covered in the next post, P.2.

Yu/stan/kema

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